Tom's == T I T A N I C == shack tm Rants!

(Being a bifurcating fractal rant about the one thing
that truly matters in the universe...)

"Cameron has gone Kurtz, like he did on The Abyss."

-- an anonymous visual-effects insider

There are two types of people: people that know about James Cameron, and those who don't. Those that know of him are split into two camps: those who are fanatical about him, and those who think he's gone too far this time. The ones who think Jim has gone too far don't matter; the fanatical Cameron Fremen are the only ones who really matter, especially those that think that Cameron is the Kwizatz Haderach!

"May the Universe be cleansed by his passing."

In Frank Herbert's "Dune" series, the Fremen are a desert people who have endured generations of struggle, forced migrations from planet to planet, and finally the unrelenting desert on Arrakis. They have a prophecy of a leader, the Muad'Dib, who will lead them into a paradise: a desert world turned into an oasis.

It has been said that making a motion picture is akin to conducting a military campaign. James Cameron can be compared to Paul Atreides, the Kwizatz Haderach, the one who would lead our culture into a Jihad.

Our culture is geek culture, of giant robots that look like metallized members of KISS, of technology excess spinning out of control, shedding sparks as the entirety of Western Civilization as we know it speeds up a hyperbolic curve that ends around the year 2012.

Douglas Coupland has commented that Titanic is nothing more than the "The Poseidon Adventure without Shelley Winters." That's like saying "The Internet is just something to do with computers."

That's right! You don't have to worry about all of reality imploding! Just keep on doing what you're doing, thinking what you're thinking, going about your daily grind. But...VR is the nuclear bomb of the mind, and what you think is your culture.

The giant sand worms of Arrakis are like unto the CPUs in our computers. The GodComputer is Shai'Hulud! The makers create the spice.  The Spice must flow.  Computer memory is water. The water of our tribes can be found in our servers. IOmega makes the best litre-jons (except for JAZ drives).

On Arrakis, Water is Life.

The circulation of money has been likened to an eco-system. Whatever is scarce in an environment becomes the "coin of the realm". Dune is one of the first ecological novels. In Hollywood, the scarcest commodities are being able to tell a compelling story within a filmic space. Hence, Cameron is the Kwizatz Haderach!


In the Titanic trailer, Billy Zane (as Cal Hockley) is seen firing a Colt .45 pistol. Is the firearm's existence historically accurate?

John Browning designed his famous pistol sometime after the turn of the century. The US military extensively tested several pistol contenders (including what eventually became the M1911) from 1907 to 1911. The first commercial models appeared around 1912 (just in time to be carried on board the Titanic, as high-tech a weapon back then as a Glock is today). A man of Cal Hockley's means and connections could have easily acquired a "beta copy" of the firearm. It's fully plausible that a Colt .45 pistol could have found its way onboard the Titanic.

The odds are, however, that if you look REAL carefully, the .45 will probably turn out to be the M1911A1 ("type improved") variant, suitably modified for firing blanks.  ;)

When I saw the trailer for the first time, it was so intense that I thought I saw two Colt .45's being fired à la John Woo!


There's going to be many plot/action twists when the Titanic sinks. The bow section will be the first to sink, since the Titanic broke into two sections from the stress of a completely flooded bow. On screen, it will appear as though it's sinking for what appears to be the final time.

It's classic Cameron: lead everyone to believe that it's the final end for our favorite characters, the ship breaks in two, a drawn-out pause as the stern rights itself, then all hell breaks loose and then the Titanic sinks for good...and then there's another plot twist! (No, I don't know what it is, since I haven't read the screenplay...but you can be guaranteed that Jim Cameron will include one.)

Apparently, Cameron is obsessed with getting all the details and story elements right:

(LOS ANGELES) - Those laboring on digital elements of "Titanic" say their tight deadlines have been strained even more by director Jim Cameron's inclinations to equate "more" and "better." They say he has been particularly obsessed with a poop-deck scene late in the movie. So, after Cameron walked in with a recent order for 50 extra digital shots, the overwrought troops derisively christened the sequence "Poop Deck, The Movie." (The Hollywood Reporter)

COMING SOON: A rant against the mass media, who don't understand Cameron, ecology or "Dune", and who will inevitably find facile headlines and metaphors for the motion picture "Titanic".

(The only thing that matters in the universe is THE GNARL!!!)

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Last updated 1997 November 30th, 20.22 hours (Vancouver local time).

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